House Rules

Not the show. Last night I went to a house party where beer pong was taking place. The two people whose place it was were idiots. People from the other apartment were cool, but these guys were morons. My friend Nick and I were on the list behind his girlfriend and her roommate. When it was the girls' turn we were informed of the "house rules" from the two idiots. First, probably the stupidest of the rules, the new team has to set up both sides. This wasted tons of time. After much hubbub about that rule the idiots did it themselves. And went on about other rules including "on fire." However they called it "NBA Jam" which is fine but when they hit two in a row they said "He's heating up!" nothing like in the game and when someone became "on fire" at least five guys standing around decided to yell very loudly and were astonished that somebody could make three cups in a row. What a feat. The other stupid rule was that if you miss the cups and table completely, you have to take one of your own cups. Supid. There are variations of that rule that I prefer that if someone catches the air ball, then a cup is taken away. Much better and takes more awareness. The last rule that was interesting, kind of stupid though and not thought through as far as I would have hoped was the "Segal Rule." This rule stated that if a ball is rimmed, you can swat it back to the other team while saying "Segal." If the ball hits anyone on the team they need to take a cup. Aparently there becomes problems when the ball is caught after the swat. Arguments occur. I would have called it the "dodgeball rule" and the swating team would be penalized for a caught swatted ball. Again, when this was succesfull the two idiots and their friends decided to go crazy like this kind of thing never happend. So naturally, I was not a fan of these two we were playing.
When Nick and I played we lost pretty badly because Nick was too drunk and I had a terrible game. But we were able to attain a rerack. When asked if we cared whether it was centered or not, I imediately responded, "Yes" with a stern look. We lost that game and left the imediate area.
We were upstairs having a decent time, and one of the idots shows up (stumbling a little, I think it was an act) and states that they were able to sign the table because they went 7-1. I'm a little perplexed because they also said that they retired the table due to being too drunk. How do you retire if you lose. But the other stupid thing is that they signed the table because they had one five in a row. Again, big deal. It's been done before. I and my firnd Charlie went 11-1 one night and never deemed it neccessary to sign anything. Sure we would have signed a few autographs if we were asked but nobody really cared when something happened that happens frequently enough. Whatever, they are idiots and I probably won't return there. That's enough.